March 20th 2013 would have been my Mum’s 60th birthday. Unfortunately she passed away in 2006.
6 years, 4 months and 5 days on it hasn’t got any easier. People lead you to believe that time heals the wound that death inflicts on your soul. But it doesn’t. You’re left with a scar on your soul, something forever missing from your life.
I think of all the things I would’ve done for my Mum’s birthday had she been here. Instead I’ve brought her flowers that I will place at her grave.
I often dream of my Mum, I worry slightly that my dreams of her mean that a part of me still believes she’s here, still believes she’ll be back, as though she’s simply gone away and will return. Sometimes after dreaming of her, I will wake up and be hit with the pain of losing her all over again, because the dreams are so wonderful and that’s all I have now.
Dear Mum, Wherever you are, I hope you know how much I loved you and still do love you, more than anything, and how much I miss you, and how I wish that you were here with me still, because life is empty without you. You were my best friend, an amazing Mum, you were the world to me. Happy Birthday Mum xx