I don’t know how I can hate being here so much and want to be gone and yet want to live and experience everything wonderful. It’s like there are two sides to me and I’m being ripped part.
I just need to get away from myself, in the problem, Times like this I really wish I’d never been born. I wish I had someone to turn to help me through this. Instead I’m sat in an empty room thinking of awful things to do to myself, but if I don’t move I can’t do anything stupid, so I just have to not move.